If you want someone to trust you, you will first have to become trustworthy. This is not an easy feat to pull off and being trustworthy has to do with very deep and basic personality traits. Stephen M. R. Covey dissected trust in his fantastic book The Speed of Trust. In this article I will discuss the the way to build trust and become trustworthy along the lines set out by Stephen M.R. Covey (this is Stephen R. Covey’s son).
The 4 Foundations of Credibility
You should think of trust as a tree. A giant old oak can only be trusted to stand because it has a good foundation (its roots). Because it has grown roots for a long time, it can now hold a lot of leafs and is magnificent to the eye.
But that oak tree didn’t start by making leafs. It began by laying a good foundation, then surfaced, built a trunk and finally has big branches with many, many leafs. The 4 foundations of credibility are the same. First is integrity, then intention. Then comes competence and finally results.
The 4 Foundations of Credibility
Integrity
Having good integrity isn’t as easy as it sounds. Integrity means that you say what you do and you do what you say. The first part refers to letting people know what you are doing. This means you never leave someone in the dark about what you are working on or what your plans are.
The second part is about doing what you promise to do. Make sure you always do as you say. Nothing is more destructive for your integrity than making a promise and breaking it. And this is easily done, because we tend to make promises very light-heartily. Don’t!
If you want to practice with integrity, then start by making a promise list. In this list, write down every promise you make. And once completed cross it off. Note that a promise is a promise as soon as the other person or party expects something from you. It doesn’t mean you say ‘I promise’. Be very aware of this general misconception about promises!
Intention
As soon as you have covered the integrity level, you can start building on the intention level. You cannot do this unless you have worked on your integrity. The intention level means that you enter every situation with a win-win mentality. Your intention must be good and the best intention is win-win.
Win-win is an often misunderstood concept. It doesn’t mean ‘I get what I want’. Also it doesn’t mean ‘they get what they want’. It means ‘we get what we want’. Notice that there is a big difference between ‘you and me’ and ‘us’.
In some situations the demands of both parties seem to not be able to be solved. If even very creative solutions don’t work, do not be afraid to not make a deal. Not making a deal doesn’t hurt your integrity and it doesn’t hurt your intention either. Only accept deals when both parties truly win.
Competence
Once you are ready to accept only win-win deals, you are building your competence. You have laid the foundation to start to show others success that can be gained by working this way. In the tree analogy, this is the tree trunk, which is the foundation for the next level.
Competence is about TASKS. Talent, Attitude, Skills, Knowledge and Style. Be you, work with your good intentions and high integrity and this level is the easy part. It just consists of working hard. Doing the right things is ensured by the foundation of the preceding 2 levels, integrity and intention.
Results
The final level, results, is the culmination of this approach. Once you can show results you can prove that you are trustworthy. You can show people that you have what it takes: high integrity, good intentions, competence and a track record.
Recommended books
If you want to read more about win-win and trust, make sure to read the following two books. These books are classics in the self-improvement department, being world-wide bestsellers. You can’t go wrong with these books!
Wed, Jan 13, 2010
Entrepreneurship, Self Improvement